Thursday, August 23, 2007

Roses are special

I mentioned in the last post about my three miscarriages. I just wanted to share something really sweet that my dh did for me.
About 2 years after my 3rd miscarriage I happened upon an article in Today's Christian Women. It was entitled Secondary Infertility. I was surprised at how many people had one child yet had so many problems conceiving afterward. You really feel guilty to share it especially since you have a child because you don't want to appear ungrateful to others so you just tend not to mention your longing for another child and the problems you are having. The author went on to say that she had 4 children and recently lost a baby and how devistating it was to her and her family so they bought a baby rose bush and planted it in memory of the baby. She said that the bush grew beautifully but the roses would bloom on the other side of her fence. I thought what a wonderful picture of my children blooming in heaven. She added that when she had a friend lose a baby she would carry them dinner and a rose bush. I thought it was a very sweet article and told my husband about it. I believe this was one day in January.
Fastforward to Mother's Day and my husband and sweet son came home with a minature rose bush. I cried so much. It really was one of the best Mother's Day gifts ever for me. Mainly because my husband had listened to me and must have actually heard me:) And of course because it represented our babies. We planted the rose bush and I must say I did not have much of a green thumb at the time so I prayed very hard that no matter what I did the the Lord would allow that rose bush to survive. Each year it would bloom and I would cut 3 roses off and put them in a vase just as a sweet reminder of my children in heaven. The Lord surprised us ( I say surprised because we had pretty much given up) 9 years after my first was born with another boy and when my 2nd was 9 months old another surprise gift was in the works a third boy. After our second was born in May of 2002 I noticed the rose bush looked a little yucky but it still produced so I did not worry about it. When our third child was born in September 2003 the bush looked like it was on it's last leg. Very soon after we lost the bush. We have three babies in heaven and now three on earth I really thought it was special that while my heart yearned for others the Lord allowed the bush to survive yet once my heart was full the bush died.

Again I must give the disclaimer that this is what the Lord did for me. Not because I am more spritiually mature than anyone else this was just part of His plan for my life. Each life is special and different and the plan that the Father has for them is good and perfect. Again before I hit the publish button I will pray for those struggle with infertility or the loss of a child. I pray that the Lord will put a song in your heart and that you will be able to have joy in the midst of a difficult time.

On a lighter note :) I will be having a give away to celebrate my 50th post coming up soon. So check back.


ADELE said...

Wow, this post really brought tears to my eyes. I know all too well the pain of infertility and how your heart breaks with the loss of a child. I love the rose bush idea.
You are an amazing woman of faith and I am always uplifted when I visit your blog.

Kim said...

Linda, You have no idea how timely both of these posts are. I found out yesterday (Wednesday) afternoon that our pastor and his wife lost their baby. She was 20 weeks. They also lost a baby (not quite as far along) a couple of years ago. They have 2 daughters in elementary school but are so devastated. They had found out recently that it was a boy. I've not been able to speak to them but I'm going to pray about the rose bush idea. I painted a tray for them tonight and have a card for them. If the Lord leads me, and it is okay with you, I'm going to print this post and give it to them with the card. Thank you for allowing God to use you as His vessel to comfort & convict your readers and to further His Kingdom. Hugs ~ Kim

Sandy McTier said...

All I can say is you are an incredible sister! You've always relied on your faith to get you through these difficult times and YOU so inspire me and now through your blog your faith and wisdom inspire others!
God does have His ultimate plan for each of us and sometimes it's hard to understand the pits and valleys but when we stand high on the mountain and seek HIM first it's easier to give it all up to Him and know that he is in control.

Have a wonderfully blessed day!
Your sis!

carole said...

I can't imagine a greater heartbreak than losing a child.
This is a beautiful post.
God used roses in my own life. My father grew amazing roses. When I tried, I would get healthy green stems and thorns, but no roses. I lost my father to cancer and it took several years to get past the sadness of how he suffered in the end. The summer that I finally felt a shift from the sadness to a focus on our wonderful memories, I had a few roses finally bloom. Haven't had any more in the 3 years since.
(so glad you commented on my blog, it brought me to your very inspirational site, thanks!)

Diann said...

You just continue to touch my heart with what God has done in your life. What an awesome husband to know just the right thing to do for you and then how God took over from there! God has used your experience to touch others that have or are going through the same thing. Bless you!

Jill@Who Could Ask for Anything More said...

Linda, This was really a very touching post. God is so very good.

justabeachkat said...

Wow! What a beautifully written and very touching post. Thanks for sharing.


Holly said...

Thank you so much for both of your thoughtful recent posts. I was deeply touched by both of them and appreciate you sharing your experiences. God's timing is perfect, even though we don't always understand it at the time. The roses were such a wonderful idea and I'm glad they gave you comfort.

Anonymous said...

Isn't God amazing?!
We sand a song in church yesterday that was written by Matt Redman. Here are a few words, "Oh, No. You never let go. Through the rain and through the storms, Lord. Oh, no. You never let go. You never go of me." WOW! What a great reminder that we all need.
Rm. 8:28,

Paige said...

I was reading more of your blog and I loved your story about the rose bush. Unfortunately I had a miscarriage also. Blessings! I will be adding your blog link to my page. :)